This happened to me about four years ago now, but it is something that I am very thankful for in some ways and wanted to share it here.
–
Psalm 40:2, NASB: “He brought me up out of the pit of destruction, out of the miry clay, And He set my feet upon a rock making my footsteps firm.”
Besides the summer of 2000 when I gave my life to God through Christ and was cleansed and forgiven of my sinfulness, God has pulled me from the pit of destruction and miry clay again from time to time. Sometimes, it has been a sin struggle, (particularly, with prophanity, something I do not struggle with as much now). Other times, it has been a deeper struggle within myself, a struggle with doubt and darkness. A struggle to that end is what I would like to share in this post.
Have you ever gone through a time when it felt as though God wasn’t there– like He had turned a deaf ear to you or just simply didn’t care? I know that I have. However, I came to find that it was not God who had turned from me, but rather, I who had turned from Him. In the winter of 2007, everything around me was going well– amazingly well, in fact! I had recently been inducted into the International Honors Society of Two-year Colleges, (Phi Theta Kappa), and was active in about three other extracurricular groups on campus, one in which I was president. My grades were good, and I had made many new friends there at the community college where I was getting my Associate’s Degree before planning to transfer out to a private four-year college that coming fall. In the midst of all that external joy and temporal pleasure I was experiencing, I was struggling deep down in the depths of my being– at the very core of who I am. I had begun to rely too much on me– thinking that I was fine on my own. At no point did I ever consciously decide to rely on me, but I think it was more of a subconscious thing. I turned from the Book of Life to the book of academia and my focus was to get out of the community college as fast as I could, even though I enjoyed going there. I already had my plan in place, and while that plan did not change, God had plenty to show me before leaving home. As the semester wore on, I became more and more discouraged. I would attend Campus Crusade for Christ, (Cru), meetings, and I attended a friends’ Bible study a few times, but it just seemed that every time I prayed, God just didn’t answer. I recall crying out to God as the Psalmist did saying “Where are you god”! After awhile, I grew tired of praying and not receiving any answers, or at least, it seemed so at that time. I had come very, very close to walking away– completely throwing in the towel with this faith business and just giving up on God. However, it was at that very moment that God reached out and pulled me out of my own “pit of destruction”. It was at that very moment that God reached out and pulled me from the “miry clay” that I had made of my life and placed me back upon the Rock of Ages who never changes. He brought three very strong Christian folks into my life who helped me to see the light again. I recall the joy I felt at being reunited with my Heavenly Father again! It was almost as if a light came on inside of me again, as a light being switched on in a room that had been abandoned and left in the dark for a long time. I am ever thankful to God for pulling me out and preparing me for what was ahead in the months following that time in my life. It seemed that everything changed all at once for me– moving away from home, family situations, making new friends, adjusting to a new life away on a college campus. I learned that God is my everlasting foundation, and He never changes, even when everything in this world seems to crumble, shift, and change. Jesus Christ is the same yesterday, today, and forever!
I see two things from this struggle: God brought me back to Himself, and God prepared me for what was to come. I am thankful for this struggle because it taught me to never rely on me, and it also made me much stronger in my faith. God knows our needs, not what we *think* we need, but what we truly need. Praise be to Jesus! 
